


For the Record

by Vega_Lume



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: F/F, Gen, Humor, M/M, Other, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-10-04
Updated: 2007-10-04
Packaged: 2019-01-20 01:42:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12422424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vega_Lume/pseuds/Vega_Lume
Summary: Relena writes a memo - pointless humor-ish-ness...





	For the Record

October the 4th 2007

Title: For the Record  
Author: Vega-Lume  
Disclaimer: if Gundam Wing really were mine, it would only be available as a fan-sub!  
Warnings: ermm…humor? Relena’s POV  
Pairings: RxD 2x1 5xsword  
Rating: PG for very mild language

Okay this story is completely pointless, I had the flu and while I was home recuperating I read a bunch of fics in my archive these are some of my thoughts after I read a few of them and noticed a pattern… 

 

For the Record  
By Vel

Memorandum: To Gundam Wing Fan Fic Writers  
From: R.D.P 

~To whom it may concern;

All right, I have had enough of this. Heero is my best friend and that is all. Sure, I love him but I am sick and tired of all those screwy fan fic-ers out there pinning the blame on me for every little thing that goes wrong for his relationships.~

~Let me clear this one thing up before I continue. Heero is gay, and I do not mean he simply finds other men attractive I mean GAY, and you all thought Quatre was the queer one. ~

~Nope Quatre is as straight as I am, Heero on the other hand went as Dr. Frankenfurter for Halloween last year and as sick as I am to say this, he as a better figure in drag then I do in my everyday clothes.~

*hears sniggering from behind her*

“Do you have something to add?”

“As straight as I am? Since when do you lie?” he sniggered again

“I don’t know what you mean…”

“Those were Quatre’s pumps and your girlfriends’ corset that I wore for that costume.”

I blushed furiously “I was just tying to get a point across, the details of my life should be unimportant.”

~Now all of you fan girls out there get this through your heads right now. I do not like Heero that way, I never have I mean he is like my brother that is just creepy.~

~I have read some of those stories out there where I have threatened to harm his lover if he did not come to me. Ones where I’ve drugged him, rapped him *shudders* called him to the him of duty dragging him away from his love, taken advantage of his kind heart, killed him, kidnapped him/his lover/or his children. Lies, all lies.~

Heero rolled his eyes.

~Anyway…where was I? Oh, yes, Heero’s gay and so am I, hell we all are except Wufei I think?~

“Bi.” Heero added helpfully.

~Well there ya go now will you all just lay off, why not write some more of those juicy lemons? And if you’re gonna go for the angst, leave me out, okay. I am a pacifist dammit if you are going to write about me doing naughty things, I had better be doing them to Dorothy.~

“Dorothy!” I cried batting my girlfriends hand away from the computer. 

“What? Were you not just last night, lamenting the fact of how few lemons there are out there involving us?”

“Well yes…”

“Leave it in.” Heero added after he had read what Dorothy had written

“Okay, but on one condition.” Sitting down I turned back to the computer.

~While were on the subject of bad things happening to Heero, why is it more often then not that when something bad happens to Duo, its Heero’s fault. I am just as tired of reading about Heero being a bastard as I am about me being a bitch.~

~Oh, and Heero does not bottom enough…~

“Relena!” 

“Yes Duo?” I asked innocently not bothering to look up from the computer.

“You can’t write that!”

“Why not?” I questioned, turning to look at him

“If all those fic-ers think I’m always the bottom boy, Fei would never let me live it down!”

“I caught Wufei humping his sword; I don’t think you have anything to worry about.” I watched, amused, as he turned six different shades of red before settling on a stunning ruby shade then collapsed on the floor in a roar of laughter.

“If I may finish…” no one answered, I suppose watching Duo was far more interesting then what I was writing.

~In conclusion, no more angst where I’m a bitch or where Heero’s a bastard, and I suppose that we are all in a agreement that Heero needs to bottom more and lemons for everyone.~

Thank you,  
Relena, Heero, Duo and Dorothy

I turned to look at the three behind me.

“Is that alright?” I received three nods. “Great!”

Moving the mouse I clicked the send button.

 

Owari

*knocks back a shot of liquid flu medication* pointless I know but most of what Relena says is true to me, except that thing with the sword, I have never read a fic with that in it…  
Being a 2x1 angst fan I was very surprised by how few 2x1 angst fics I actually have in my archive  most of what I have in the angst department either involves Relena being and evil bitch, or Heero’s a colossal bastard…


End file.
